The Toolkit

Naya Tapper is the all-time leading try scorer in Women’s USA Rugby history. She’s a two-time Olympian and a recent medalist in the Paris games. She’s co-captained the national team and has established a scholarship in her name to help others afford getting into the sport.

I’ve been working with Karin Blair for almost five years now as my development coach. She’s seen me and walked with me, figuratively and literally on the beach, through a variety of transitions. I have a few clients I’ve worked with for several years, and I find there’s something really magical about connecting with a coach and that kind of longevity in the relationship to see the development arc over a substantial time.

“Knowledge is meant to be shared.” This is what Kasey McCravey responded when I asked her how she decided to get into coaching after retiring from playing rugby at the highest level for our USA National Team. She didn’t hesitate in her answer, and I could tell that this has become a core value in how she shows up in the world every day.

I recently sat down with Patrick to talk about his career in the NFL and the transitions he’s made since retiring as he finds his new passion. Patrick noted that he played for 4 different teams during his time in the professional league and that making the decision to leave Atlanta to go play for Buffalo was one of the hardest he’s had to make in his career. Atlanta was familiar and comfortable and warm, which I could totally identify with having grown up in Florida and moved to NY for a job at one point in my career.

It’s rare that I encounter a sport I’ve never heard of or played at some level. The few times it’s happened, I’ve found myself immediately drawn to learning about it and finding a game to get involved in. This is how I found rugby in college, how I learned about cricket while living in India, and why I was obsessed with the idea of connecting with my wife’s culinary colleague, Christina when I heard she played 9-Man.

The Stages of Team Development Model was introduced by Psychologist Bruce Tuckman in 1965, and it outlines the phases a team goes through as they develop. Click here for a more thorough explanation of the model, but the basic overview goes like this…Forming: Team members get acquainted and establish initial relationships, focusing on defining roles and goals.Storming: Conflicts arise as individuals express different opinions and vie for positions, leading to challenges in collaboration.Norming: The team begins to resolve conflicts, establish norms, and work more cohesively towards common objectives.Performing: The team operates at a high level of efficiency and collaboration, achieving goals effectively as a unified group.

This article from David Lavallee (2018) in the Journal of Loss and Trauma discusses how "higher levels of engagement in pre-retirement planning were positively associated with team selection, team tenure, and career tenure" from a study of over 600 professional athletes in the National Rugby League in Australia and New Zealand.

Brian Alexander was cut from the USA National Water Polo team, and then he was cut from his college team. Neither of these dismissals was driven by performance in the pool. Brian said he “made some really poor choices in terms of code of conduct” and that he “really wasn't putting the work in” to deserve a spot on these teams. As I listened to him recount the story, now a decade later, the pain and sadness he felt at that time in his life was still palpable. Brian shared, “I didn't have water polo in my life. That was like a huge low. That was like a rock bottom.” He hit that low and realized “I had to make a really big decision at that point. How did I want to live? What was important to me? What was it going to take, and how was I going to get back on the teams?”

I recently sat down with Ryan Reynolds…not the actor, though I would love to sit down with him…but Ryan, the former Olympian and member of the US National Women’s Rugby Team.

Cal Bouchard is a colleague in the world of Leadership Development and Executive Coaching, and she’s also the first Canadian to be drafted into the WNBA. I could go on and on about the accolades Cal’s racked up throughout the course of her basketball career, but what I loved about our recent conversation was how she paid homage to the pivotal coaches that set her on this path.

I recently sat down with Jenn Ryan, IV and Injectable Therapy Nurse and legend in the CrossFit community, to talk about her passion for her new career path.

My mom speaks "prison Spanish." I put this in quotations because this is not an actual dialect of Spanish, nor do I have any idea what words fall into this vocabulary. I took many, many years of Spanish class growing up in Florida and in college at Loyola University New Orleans. I can assure you that Señor Butler did not mention anything about "prison Spanish" in high school, and he was exceptionally thorough in his teaching.

Building a "Working with Me" document is like crafting a guidebook through the maze of collaboration. It lays out the expectations and quirks that make up your professional persona, offering a glimpse into the oddball rituals and secret handshakes that define your approach. Use this resource to help others understand you a little bit better.

Finding your superpower is like uncovering a secret code hidden in the manuscript of your life. It's a wild quest, where every odd talent and quirky trait reveals a piece of your extraordinary potential. We all have something to give that levels up those around us. Use this resource to begin to uncover your unique superpower.

Finding your passion is like sifting through the chaos of a carnival, searching for that one ride that makes your heart race. And when you finally stumble upon it, it's like discovering a hidden doorway to a vibrant world that feels like home. Use this resource as a gateway to find your next wild ride.

We often learn like wayward travelers, stumbling through existence, picking up odd bits of wisdom along the way. And in this classroom of life, every mistake is just another teacher with a peculiar sense of humor. But there’s an alternative path to making something stick, and this resource can help map the route to learning something new.

Crafting your elevator pitch is like distilling your life's chaos into a shot glass of meaning. It's the art of making the wild symphony of your experiences sound like a coherent melody in 30 seconds or less. It’s your chance to make someone believe there's method to your madness. Use this resource as a starting point for articulating the value you bring to the table.

Visualization lets you see the future you want, even when reality feels like a half-baked sci-fi novel. By imagining yourself already there, you pull those outlandish visions into the here and now, turning daydreams into truths. Use this resource to begin to see it so you can be it.

Creating a career map is like plotting a course through an wonderful and chaotic universe. It gives you a sense of direction amidst the cosmic tumbleweeds, helping you figure out where the heck you're going before you get there. Plus, it turns the unpredictable mess of life into a somewhat coherent narrative, giving you something to hold onto when the stars start to spin. Use this resource a place to start plotting your journey.

Knowing your values is like finding a sturdy raft in the swirling river of life. They anchor you amidst the chaos and give you a sense of direction, reminding you of who you truly are. Use this resource to identify what’s most important to you.